Saturday, December 30, 2006

What goes around comes around for Saddam

I finally believe that God does punish tyrants... beware!! the rest of you scoundrels, out there to destroy this world I live in. your time shall come.. am ebbing with gratitude , new year's time and Saddam hanged.. I hope it is not some fake rumor spreading itself... I cannot imagine a world with Saddam now... it has been almost 12 hours since the first scum of the millenium has been exterminated.. wow.. my world looks a lot cleaner now...

saying 2006 goodbye

last two days of 2006, I shall sleep late, wakeup late, eat more junk, excersise less, sing less, read less, watch more and more TV, orkut endlessly, cry more, think more negative, laugh less , sympathise with myself more, be more lazy, alter plans every minute, be undisciplined, fight with my parents, say no to everything, be self-opiniated on everything, listen less, talk more, judge people, wont help my mom in the kitchen, order her to get me food at my table, wont call my sister often, wont take care of my finances, spend like crazy , think am the best in the world, be egoistic blah blah blah... because.... come 2007, I resolve not to do any of the above... or lemme atleast try to be a nice girl in 2007.. so 2006 here you go... take away with u all my bad habits .., help me be a nice girl to my parents... I can no longer see the pain in their eyes and their heart.. yearning for a shade of solace and happiness for their little angel...

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Ten commandments of friendship

I wish my friends dont read this blog.. I wish THEY ,MY FRIENDS read this :) The most overyly hyped concept in this universe is 'friendship' , aint it ironical ?

1.When someone says 'I shall be your friend forever', dont buy it :) they mean 'dont get too close ok ? ' Usually these are the self-obsessed people ,to whom being dead or alive is the same thing,am being unkind, but what the heck , am in mood...

2.When someone says 'Love is the wild-rose briar ,friendship is like the holly tree' flicking a quote or two from Emily Bronte, they could never nurture a rose or a holly all their life..

3. When someone says 'When you have so many nice friends, what more do you need ? ' forgive them O' Lord for they know not what they are saying !!

4. When someone states 'A friend in need is a friend indeed', it means 'you must move on with life and when you throw a party , count me in ok ? '

5. When someone says 'I shall always be there for you', he is a goddamn liar, nothing more nothing less..

6. When someone says 'Friendship is more important than love', ask what important work they were doing when you were alone that night and crying , to be listened to.

7. When someone says 'Love of friends', be sure he can neither give love nor friendship.

8. When someone rarely speaks, beware!! he is not listening at all, not now, not ever.. back off..

9. When someone has no opinion on you, he just doesnt care, wouldnt care a dime if the world went without you the next moment, not a tear shed, not a remembrance.

10. Follow 1-9 seriously to avoid unnecessary relationships in life.

When someone thinks you are the 'Phoneix', trust him, he is your only true friend!!
To all those people to whom I matter, thanks for your faith, nothing else matters!!

Friday, August 11, 2006

hope in madness

storms of madness gatherning on
clouds of confusion uprooting trees of reason
a ray of hope holds a lone red rose
waiting for her last dance
before she bows and crushes
away to silence in eternity
hold her with your gentle arms,
for she waits for you, o young man!

Friday, August 04, 2006

of one's own language

Poetry in your own language is the most beautiful poetry of all. There is something magical about your own language for each person. Primarily language being the most successful mode of communication, it is obvious that whatever said in your language means the most to you.

Talking of kannada, it is refreshing to speak kannada, to listen to kannada songs, to read kannada and the like. Listening to old kannada movie songs is becoming an obsessive habit with me these days. This is music I have grown up with and it brings back memories of childhood. Not only that, it makes me wonder about the beauty of my language. It feels special. Sadly, I find many localites not knowing kannada and not appreciating it and it hurts.

Associating myself with this beautiful language has a special meaning in my life at the present also. I'm going through a phase wherein changes happening to my thinking, my opinions etc. I'm glad to let go of those stuck-up opinions that I must have picked up during growing up , am glad that I respect people's emotions and am glad for restoration of faith in the fact that 'He up above is the only one who can do something' if anyone can. I'm glad to start praying again. Amidst all these changes, I can say I feel at home when I think of my language. It is a weird way of saying things but I dont expect anyone to understand what am saying anyways..

Thursday, August 03, 2006

after a gap of one week

my belief in so many things are coming back, my faith is restored. Things have started happening again , after a really long time....

1. miracles
2. super natural powers
3. emotions
4. tears
5. LOVE
6. Friendships that last a lifetime
7. hormones :)
8. sleepless nights
9. dreams ( yes.. I get some dreams too )
10. my singing pitch at G
11. hindolam and the romance it evokes
12. hope.hope. hope.
13. Believing in DDLJ
14. Distant clouds,monsoons,mist and mountains when I close my eyes
15. Beautiful sunsets
16. God exists and he loves me !!

Friday, July 28, 2006

onde ondu aaseyu

Onde ondu aaseyu
tholali balasalu
onde ondu bayakeyu
ninna muddadalu

kaibale ghal ennalu
yedeyu jhillendidhe
tanuvu hoovaagi manavu haayaagi
sanihake baalide
balisaari nee baralu ee jeeva soluthide

preethiya savi maathige
geleyane sothenu
yendu ninnalle berethu ondaagi iralu naa bandhenu
innendhu naa ninage
yendendhu nee nanage

dedicated to the man of my dreams..

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Hindolam, Kambhoji and the magic of bamboo

I have to write on KSG ( read as K S Gopalalkrishnan) and his mastery over the bamboo. I have to write what I feel about the raagas Hindolam ( malkauns for HCM ) and Kambhoji. I have to write on the magic created when KSG plays on the flute. I have to write what emotions I went through while listening to this sweet music. ok here I go...

Hindolam is best played as malkauns and nothing else. If it has no Hindusthani touch then it is no good. Something happens to me when hindolam knocks on the door of my heart.. It is as if the Creator took a large spoon ( a ladle ) and stirred my soul with it.. some unknown emotions lying beneath all others seem to emerge and cause something I dont know or I cant tell in words. After a dose of hindolam, my state is one weird one. I cant sleep, I cant eat, am dazed and simply baffled. Baffled that such magical , enchanting stuff exist in this very nature that has produced some mediocre and very ordinary mortals like me. It takes about 2 days to overcome the emotional surge..

Kambhoji - can I compare you to any other raga in this musical universe ? You are absolute and eternal. I can listen to you for the rest of my life and feel incomplete. Yes, you give me a sense of incompletion , so much that I want to listen more, sing more of you. When dha and ni ( kaishiki ) are oscilating in the manner that is called kambhoji, I feel as I'm standing in front of my Creator. When you differ from song to song and when so many stalwarst have sung you , I wonder , what is it about you that makes it so dignified and aesthetic at the same time. You make carnatic Music proud. My humble request to you, please bless me with your divinity and grant me knowledge to understand your beauty.

KSG Sir, I'm too small to describe your music. All I can do is to fall at your revered feet.

Friday, July 21, 2006

random thoughts here and there..

Bollywood is a crazy place ;seeing the movies and music they make these days, I'm compelled to think thus. However like a ligtening out of the blue, once a while, we are shown glimpses of magic , creations of pure art , reflecting the best of men and women who makeup part of this world called Bollywood.

a few of those magical notes in movies made post 1989( dont ask me what this year means to me!!)
1. Ghazab kaa hain Din ( QSQT)
2. Dil Deewana ( MPK) ( SPB's version )
3. Oye Oye (Tridev) ( out of place eh ?? )
4. Ghoonghat ki Aaad Se ( HHRPK)
5. All songs from Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikandar and the whole part of the movie including the bicycle hero :)
6. Dil Hai Ki Manta Nahin
7. Mera Dil Bhi Kitna Paagal Hain and Bahut Pyar karte Hai ( Saajan )
8. Everything about DDLJ with special mention of 'Ghar Aaja pardesi' and Kajol in 'Mere Khwabon mein '
9. Repeat point 8 a million times...:)
10. A very nice Pahadi number called 'hum tumse na kuch ' from this obscure movie called Ziddi
11. Hume Jab se Mohaabat ho gayee hain from Border
12. Aisa Lagta Hain from Refugee

now my mind stops working..... yes.. all these are very romantic and mushy songs.. they stand out becuase they are good creations or attempts to recreate the poetic stuff movies in pre 80s where made of.. am sure half of the worl dwould hate these songs.. who cares.. I live listening to these day in and day out..

Ustad Mohd Rafi

I dedicate this post to my dear friend SP who in my opinion is the world's most romantic girl second only to me :) :)

Also, she has been really influential in my progress from Kishore school of music to Rafi's. And thats quite a graduation ,I tell you. Not to say that Kishore is a lesser nice singer but only that no one is comparable to the music of Mohd Rafi. As I talk to good old SP about the music called rafi, I can only ask 'what made him and his singing so special ?? ' Was it his hours of riyaaz with Bade Ustad ? A lot yes would have been that. No matter what people say about classical music, it is as true as sunrise that riyaaz does to your voice what butter does to Pav bhaji !!! ( bad comparison ?? ) But it is more than that. For Rafi , singing was second nature I guess. So, it came unknown to him maybe and when things happen without your undue interference , they almost always happen perfect !!!

I feel rafi just needs to twist the words while speaking and they turn to songs.. am listening to 'Chalkaayen jaam' and you know what i feel ? Who is there in this world for me, who can drink to the beauty of my eyes.. :) This is too much to ask I know :) but thats the point. Rafi's voice makes even the dullest of people romantic I guess.. So, now you know where SP's level of romanticism is ??

As SP and I just talked, both of us strongly believe that listening to Mohd rafi helps women stay young, look beautiful, happy and an eternal romantic.

What about the men ? Please, please atleast learn to be a little romantic by listening to Rafi !!

Tuesday, July 18, 2006

A spot in life

Missing people's presence can be the most depressing thing on earth. I tell u what, you get used to having people around u, the same people; everyday and then suddenly one day, when they dont turn up, it affects badly!. I just discovered my biggest weakness and that is .. I miss people in my life badly.. Life always throws me in a spot... when I cant do anything about so many things..
This otherwise crappy movie called 'hum tum' has just one bright side to it, and that is saif Ali khan's brilliant portryal of a 'helpless, hopeless being' :) For a while now, I have empathised with him. You see that look in his eyes everytime he fights with the girl , when he says that he cares a s*** for love and cliche like that ,all through the movie but deep down , u also see a guy madly in love and badly trying to hide it. Such is life. Throws you in a spot.

There is only one person against you in this whole world and that is you...

Monday, July 17, 2006

TMK ,RKS and Subbarama Dikshithar

yesterday's lec dem on Sangitha Sampradaya Pradarshini was an eye-opener. I'm simply amazed at the genius of our composers of yesteryears. The human mind then was so open and ready to experiment, I wonder have we lost it now ? Well, seeing TMK and RKS yesterday, I dont believe we have lost it . Our music still exists , rock solid and as enchanting as ever.

Certain nuances of the text , ragas, gamakas etc , I had no clue !! There is so much to learn , I wonder if I will live that long to even understand all of Dikshitar's kritis. :)

Also, it was my first visit to Ananya in malleswaram. That place breathes Music!! There is a sense of ambience there which is not found in the big auditoriums in Bangalore. Bangalore, I think and wish is going to become the next Carnatic Music hub in India. My city has so much to offer. We are unprejudiced and willing to listen.

Listening to RKS rant about the saahityam of Dikhshithar kritis, I'm tempted to go back to learning Sanskrit, the devabhasha. I must say that RKS is truly a sanskrit scholar and a wonderful singer too :) It is mandatory for any student of carnatic music to know Sanskrit, Telugu, Tamil , Kannada and Malayalam I think!! now that is a loong list...

I met Sowmya after a long time and we talked abt this and that. Music binds people in a manner which is difficult to explain to others. Music folks bond in less than 1 second :)

There are things I want to do , learn Sanskrit, in music - like shrutis , grahabedham, melas, Raga origins, gamakams. I'm too small a fish in this ocean... however I know how to swim....

Foremost I have to learn two things :- aligning to shruti and laya...
This reminds me of 'shrutir maatah laya pitaah'

okie now getting back to Monday morning@work.. :(

Friday, July 14, 2006

big blogging world Hi

wow, I have finaly decided to blog.. well this is gonna be fun as I'm never gonna be alone starting now... I shall have someone to talk to anytime... :)

Shankarabharanam - a raga that defines class... I love it man!

Monsoonshowers.blogspot.com - ... Monsoonshowers.. I love.. A feeling only felt when heavens fall on your face, the heart sings love and and music reminds one of clouds... Wonder if megh malhar was first conceptualised by some one drenched in these rains..

To sing in the rains is an awesome thing... to be in love during monsoons is divine... :)

am crazy these days...

ok am sleeepey now.. more later..